[Reading] ➿ Housewife ➶ Kristin K. Collier – Chainnews.us

Housewife Kristin Collier And Her Husband Struggle To Decide Whether And How To Stay Together After It Becomes Apparent That He Is Transgender As Her Husband Transitions To Live The Rest Of His Life As A Woman, Collier Leans Into Her Garden, Community, And New Romantic Interests While She Transforms In Her Own Right, Evolving As A Woman, Mother, And Housewife With Honesty, Humor, And Grounded In Her Practice Of Compassionate Communication, Collier Redefines Homemaking As She And Her Former Husband Continue To Live And Parent As Partners In The Same Household Housewife Is An Exceptionally Rare Personal Account Of A Partner S Response To Gender Transition Including Poetry, Blog Posts, And Four Pictures From Before And After Transition, Collier Tells Her Story From The Perspective Of A Woman And Mother As Her Family Breaks Out Of The Box.

10 thoughts on “Housewife


  1. says:

    In a lot of ways this was a hard read.Part of it is simply that as a queer person it s difficult to hear the ways people, including Collier herself, invalidated her spouse Seda throughout the course of the book A lot of it is the same arguments you hear everywhere You were socialized as a man You don t fall into this narrow definition of womanhood where you are a caretaker at your own expense, so obviously you can t be a woman But what s happened has happened, and I appreciate the bravery Collier has in admitting her behavior.Part of it is that this book is really dated I was shocked to find it just came out in 2016, because so much of the language and how it is used runs counter to how I ve seen it used In a way I suppose this makes sense, since Collier herself is a heterosexual cis woman In a few places the word transexual is used, which, okay, if that s how Seda identifies and she doesn t mind that being used as the descriptor, power to her There are plenty of older trans folk who still use that in place of transgender But that s another thing Transgender is all one word, where trans on its own is an adjective So if I wanted to specify that Seda is a trans woman, the two words would be separated This isn t the case here in the book There s also the issue that at one point there is a footnote that says somethi...


  2. says:

    When Kristin Collier s husband comes out as trans, they both have questions about what it means for their marriage Will they stay together How will the children react Housewife explores the changing dynamics of a family It explores Collier s reaction to those changes and the effect it has on her as a woman Who is she now that she has a wife A lot of the language around trans people e.g., transsexual, FTM and MTF felt outdated and jarring to me I don t whether this is because of differences in how trans issues are discussed in the US vs Europe or the US vs Ireland Maybe it s a personal preference of Collier and her family I m not sure, but as the memoir progressed these terms appeared less often and trans and transgender took their place Maybe these words are an indication of the time these events took place, the time of Yahoo groups Maybe the choice of words show how far Collier s knowledge had come throughout this experience Maybe it s a combination of all these things This did occupy my mind for a significant portion of the book It made going with the flow of ...


  3. says:

    The book was ok, but too many literary and artistic side trails I think I was mostly disappointed by the subject matter as a cis woman with a trans partner myself, I was hoping to read a story of hope and support Instead I read a story about a housewife who leached off of and benefited from her trans partner wh...


  4. says:

    When Kristin Collier s husband revealed to her that he suffered what medical jargon names as gender dysphoria, she and he and the kids went to the library and came back with books on dinosaurs, bugs, castles and transsexuals Included in their haul was at least one good memoir detailing the experience of transitioning, but no account of what the experience might be like for a gender changer s spouse A Yahoo Groups forum for old partners of newly transitioning folks eventually provided a common ground where she could learn, explore, and exchange After a certain point, though, she felt called to take into account her own circumstances and map out the winding path to truth as she had come to know it I have attempted to write the book, she says, as heart opening memoirs often do, that I was longing for at that time It s a boots on the ground odyssey through norms, expectations, inner experience the phases and nuances of coming to terms with one s own changes when the acknowledged inner truth of a loved one changes radically Her prose is at once ...


  5. says:

    The title of this book is rather misleading The first half of the book is about how a couple struggles when one person comes out as trans This part was very well written and quite heartwrenching I would recommend this to anyone in those shoes.But the second half of the book was completely crazy Why does the author stay with her spouse Oh that s right, she doesn t work and her spouse is supporting her financially This her spouse does while the author sleeps around, has multiple relationships with men, brings them into her home, spends 4 months in an experiment at Key west with her boys and her lover, searches for turtles, breaks up with her lover, moves back with her spouse, and finally winds up with yet another guy living in the same house with her, her spouse, and their kids.Im not sure what the second half of her story has to do with being in a transgender marriage Did her spouse being transgender give her license to sleep around Where is the faithfulness there Wher...


  6. says:

    Reviewed for Foreword Books IndieFab Awards.About half of this book was great and relevant and interesting and useful About half of this book was superfluous at best but likely detracting The first half of the book well, after we got through the completely irrelevant part about the birth of her child was very enlightening about how someone lives with a spouse who is going through a transition However, the second half of the book, about her dating other men and the polyamorous situations that arose really didn t contribute to the book, or to the important story she was trying to tell Cutting the book to about half its current length would make it so much stronger and better, but even with that critique, it s a great book that can help answer some important q...


  7. says:

    We ve been fortunate in the past few years to have some courageous transgender folks write and publish books about their experiences It has been nothing short of shocking and enlightening But has anyone written about the partners or spouses and what they go through Did we ever even think about this Along comes Housewife home remaking in a transgender marriage, by Kristin Collier, an honest and authentic first hand account of what it s like transitioning through genders from the perspective of the spouse Kristen brings us smack into a gender awareness that most of us take for granted Women don t generally question why we like feeling the swish of a skirt on our legs, how we keep mascara from gumming up, or the reason one color looks better on us than another Imagine if your husband suddenly started asking for tips about these things This book takes us through the pain of losing a husband and father while still feeling so much love and connection to this person Kristen explores what happens to her family while her husband is transitioning from male to female Her identity as a wife, mother, and lover comes into question because our family could be on the brink of extinction They not only survive, but thrive This is hard stuff, and Kristin takes us right into the center of it It s hard to read sometimes because the pain of the situation is tangible and she holds nothing back But it s worth the journey to see how...


  8. says:

    This is a wonderful read At times heartbreaking, at times poignant, funny, painful, delightful, soul searching Collier lays herself bare and her raw honesty is so engaging Begs the question, what would ...


  9. says:

    I really appreciated Collier s candor and how she tried to always keep her communication compassionate with all the people she interacted with including herself The honesty of this book is inspiring and I lovelovelove the relationship she has with Seda.


  10. says:

    What I loved most about the book was the author s vulnerability This is not a book about being loving and accepting and optimistic no matter what life throws your way a husband who believes he s a woman, for example , but about navigating life s ups and downs with bravery It s about how to be a mother when your personal life is falling apart It s about how to embrace...

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